the first time
there is really nothing to tell. nothing exceptional, that is. except maybe for the utter indifference of both parties. there is the usual nakedness, a bit of groping, maybe even a caress here or there. there were moans and sighs and groans of pleasure. and some sweat. and saliva too, of course. aside from those, there was nothing else. nothing important to merit the use of words and the expenditure of blog space.
afterward, only the linen was creased and only our bodies were entangled. there were no emotions to be figured out, no feelings to be confessed, no future to be shared.
honestly, if not for the stains on the blanket, it would seem like we just cleaned house. there is a sense of accomplishment, of having achieved something significant but not worthwhile. just one item on a long check-list of things to do or errands to run. as i was getting dressed, i could not help but grope my pockets for i seemed to have lost something, but i couldn’t figure out what.
when i arrived home, i went straight to the bathroom and took a long bath with a lot of scrubbing. maybe i am trying to cleanse myself or maybe i just want to eliminate the scent of the blankets. either way, i scrubbed away with purpose. afterward, i feel fulfilled, of having accomplished something insignificant but worthwhile.