the great feline struggle

the problem with cats, aside from being cold and frigid creatures, are their insensitive and persistent nature

(thats why i so love my sunshine)

recently the species once again proved why they are sooo not fit to live with humans. read on:

our resident cat (who looks like a walking dirty rag) woke me up one night, scratching at the floor below my bed. i tried stopping her by threatening her with death and involvement with certain culinary recipes but to no avail. so i was forced to get out of bed (its 3am) and sprayed her with baygon. that stopped her. 1-0

intent with getting even with me,  the cat the next morning, gave birth in my room,  dirtying the floor with blood and two black things that kept on making meowing noises. 1-1

with cunning and brains, i fetched my shine (my dog) and put her in my room to drive away the cat.

she failed me. my dog busied herself with the trashcan while the cat just laid there like a queen, nursing her two monsters. so i decided to take matters in my own hands.

i picked one of the monsters and dropped her outside my door. as i was going for the other one, the evil rag went to the door to get the evicted monster and return her to the room. so i was forced to pick all three of them and shove them outside the door. 2-1

i hurriedly closed the door but the rag is determined to conquer my room. she kept on clawing at the door. so i yelled for my mom to drive away the rag (its her cat after all). so i was trapped in my room for the 15 minutes it took my mom to hear my anguish (naks, anguish) and discipline her pet. 2-2

my mom put the pests in the kitchen.

but i am not satisfied. i want the total defeat of the rag. so i wiped the blood in my room and used the bloodied rag to wipe the kitchen floor. with blood stains on the linoleum i called my mom and complained about the mess the rag is making. she drove the rag outside the house. bwahahaha 3-2

cats are not so smart after all.

smirk

One Response to “the great feline struggle”

  1. innocent bystander Says:

    them pussies and you don’t go well together… hmmmm…
    how queer

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