tired. just tired.
physically and mentally tired.
i have been working for three straight weeks without any weekend break, and im tired.
and the worst thing is that im not happy-tired
its not the kind of tiredness that plasters a smile on your face when you sit back exhausted from your efforts
Nor is it sad-tired too
its not the tiredness that would make you wail and struggle against your present situation, motivating you to claw your way out of it
its more of a numb-tired kind of tiredness
its the tiredness that deadens
its like having an out of body experience and you see yourself blindly going through the day doing as much as you can without making any dent in the pile of duties that you have to accomplish
its the kind of tiredness that makes you forget about time. you just work, work, work until you realize that a whole year has passed by without you noticing it
its the tiredness that lulls you to complacency inspite of your current situation
you get used to it day after day until it seems normal to you. you wake up. work. sleep. then do it all over again.
a new breed of robots.
youre tired but youre not struggling against it
there are no smiles as you put yourself to sleep at night
nor any determination to escape as you wake up every morning
there is just tiredness
and nothing else.