Archive for July, 2007

para sa iyo at sa mga kasama mo

Posted in poetry on July 30, 2007 by armedlittleboy

One Fine Day

By Dame Nita Barrow

One fine day I shall walk with my head held high
My back ever so straight
My strides long and purposeful
As I take my walk
My hips will swing from left to right
With absolutely no thought about cellulite
My breasts will have a dose of sanity
And disobey the laws of gravity
I will carry a large bag
Full of everything I need
For work, for play and for looking good
Everything, that is,
Except money
But who cares?

For on this fine day
I will not be alone
I will be walking with those who do not care
About being a size four, fourteen, or forty
About being eighteen, eighty or eight-nine,
With those who are not bothered
About the difference between Somalia and Somaliland
Nor the distance between Cape Verde and Cape Town

Yet they know about dreams and visions
They know about hopes and aspirations
They know that if you work hard enough
Think big enough
Dream large enough
And live long enough
Dreams do come true
And visions do come to life
And that we don’t have to die
Before we go to heaven

On this fine day I will walk
Bag full of this and that
My body responding to the warm caress of the sun
And even if it is cold
I will walk free of all the symbols and signifiers that tell me
I am less than who I am

Those I am walking with will know how I feel
We are walking a road we have all paved together
And it is finally taking us to the places we want to go

Oh, how I will enjoy my walk
On this fine day
With all my sisters
And the brothers who would like to join us


foods and you and me and us

Posted in Uncategorized on July 29, 2007 by armedlittleboy

foods are just like people

i guess we patterned it on ourselves

ancient cooks sitting by the window looking for inspiration and latching on to the first person that comes in sight

and because of that

now we have tasteless foods just like we have boring people

delicious dishes and yummy people (hehehe)

and unhealthy meals like dsyfunctional people

and amidst the numerous food types (also people types)

we have the freedom to choose what we eat, and who we will eat it with

however, the trouble with this ability to choose is that we do not always choose what is the best but we gravitate towards what looks to be the best

you see, the unhealthy foods are designed to look and taste good but not offering anything else in terms of nutrition, only a fleeting satisfaction that would make you crave for more

and one tends to give in to it, bite after bite, day after day, and realizing one gloomy raining day that you are overweight, or have diabetes, or clogged arteries or some other condition that would justify the crying of the skies (geezzz too poetic)

the healthy ones, ironically, tend to be tasteless and lacking pomp and bravura presentation-wise and thus so prone to be passed by in a buffet line; only those on the brink of death, or desperate to hold on to the last vestiges of health get a serving of the tasteless muck

there are of course the healthy and delicious types, but they tend to be too expensive (ergo unattainable) or hard to come by (read: your late, if you have come earlier you would have been first in the line) and so they just tend to be eaten in dreams and fantasies

so i guess the trick is to have a balance of the unhealthy-yummy types and the healthy-boring ones

being on guard to keep one’s consumption of the unhealthy-yummy at a minimun lest one develops an addiction to it

and getting as much as the healthy-boring that one can force down one’s throat to ensure that one remains healthy enough to be able to continue munching on the yummies.

p.s. magulo ba? magulo? hah! yung mga naguguluhan should just read aesop’s fables. simpletons.

emotional archeology 3

Posted in Uncategorized on July 29, 2007 by armedlittleboy

why cant we get all the people in the world that we really like and then just stay together?

 i guess that would not work.

someone would leave.

someone always leaves.

then we have to say goodbye.

i hate goodbyes.

i know what i need.

i need more hellos.


unfear of death

Posted in Uncategorized on July 22, 2007 by armedlittleboy

im not really afraid of dying

and i have realized this for quite some time now

before i am quite proud to announce out loud that death does not scare me

it makes me feel different from most people who gets jittery at the mere mention of their death

i feel im rather brave for not flinching at the possibility of my demise

i believe that there is no sense in being scared of the inevitable

dying after all is just like pooping, everyone experience it

but today i realized it might be a whole different thing

my unfear of death that is

maybe i am not afraid of dying because i do not have anything to lose

i do not have a life i would regret to trade for something unknown

i must be in the middle, in between those who commit suicide and those who cling to life at all cost

committing suicide is embracing death caused by hating life

clinging is grasping for existence due to love of life

me, im just floating

no fear

but no hugging too


p.s. tinamad na magsulat

left behind

Posted in Uncategorized on July 22, 2007 by armedlittleboy

last friday i went to a wake of a former professor

an atheist (or so he claimed) in a church

colleagues and students delivering eulogies the deceased cannot anymore hear

videoclips played amidst his closed eyelids.

one wonders why we do the things we do when someone dies

why we feel the need to come together with the remains 

why we need to prepare speeches proclaiming the goodness of the dead

painstakingly create a video presentation of the memories he left behind

when the person we are doing all these things for are beyond speeches, video clips, and tears

when the person is somewhere we cannot even begin to fathom or imagine

if we are really going to be realistic and sensible about it what we do for the dead are just a waste of time

unless of course we really do it for ourselves

the coming together

the speeches

all the preparations

are for us, for those who are left behind

maybe we need these things

maybe we need to come together to remind us of life

that the sharing of memories, the testaments of good deeds, the accounts of how the dead affected us remind us that we did live, we did share something

that with the walls we painstakingly build around us, we are connected, however flimsily by a person

and with that flimsy connection vanishing into the unknown, we get together to find other ways of connecting

reminiscing first about the deceased, sharing memories in order to build the foundation from a common ground

then moving on to establish or reestablish whatever we have lost with his passing

the wake, the funeral, the programs

these are really for us

a sort of life vest to help us stay afloat until the next boat comes for us.

reviews: the blue woman

Posted in Uncategorized on July 18, 2007 by armedlittleboy


at this point in my blogging experience I would like to introduce what will be a regular part of my esteemed blog: the reviews!!!

the reviews would be about uhm reviews (dum dum)

reviews on everything i feel is worth wasting my time on

for the first edition of the reviews i would like to make a critical commentary on a woman i have twiced fallen in line with at the fx station

she is, i think, in her mid-thirties (no mam, your thick glasses and dried manang hair will not fool me in believing you are in your 50s) and is always wearing a sky blue long sleeved blouse and a dark blue skirt that ends just below her knees. when waiting in line, and even when inside the fx, she would be reading a tagalog romance novel (the one you can buy for 40pesos in national) until she reaches ortigas

now mam (in case you are reading this) firstly, that sky blue blouse and dark blue skirt just do not really do it for me, i mean if that is your office uniform i think its time to quit the job. those clothes make you look like a member of an off shoot of Ang Dating Daan. In fact when I first saw you I almost expected you to bring out a tambourine from your gigantic bag and sing Jesus is alive at the top of your voice, dead hair swinging back and forth between your shoulders, while passing a donation bag right down the end of the line.

second, those romance novels that you read, why do they look so old and torn? i mean you dont rent them from a nearby sari-sari store do you? its only 40pesos in national bookstore. and with your ericsson p990i im sure you can afford to buy dozens of tagalog romances to last you until you resign from that dreadful company with those dreadful uniforms.

which brings me to another point, the p990i phone and the tagalog romance novels just do not go well together. you should make up your mind on whether to project a manang image from a D household or a sophisticated career woman. it is quite hard for me mam so early in the morning to have cognitive dissonance just because of conflicting images that you portray. please stick to stereotypes. it will be easier for both of us.

finally, that hair. can you please tie it in a bun or something? i know there is no dandruff or lice in it since i dont think anything can survive and propagate in a dead environment but it still gives me the creeps. that hair looks just like what Madame auring would look like if she becomes a hair. please have pity.



fin boy

Posted in Uncategorized on July 16, 2007 by armedlittleboy

i have been into swimming lately

you see there is a newly opened ‘aqua sports’ center a few minutes away from my house so i try to go there at least twice a week to practice my strokes (naks) and improve my physique (hanep)

the center has 2 pools: a 50m and a 25m

serious swimmers, those who do laps, use the 50m pool , swimming back and forth, back and forth, over and over again pushing their swimming muscles to the limit

those who are not ‘swimmer’ enough to do laps, gasping for breath after only a couple of laps, muscles screaming for rest, heart somersaulting to exertion populate the 25m pool

i swim in the 25m pool

i mean i could of course swim in the 50m

crossing its length with my seamless free style or my graceful breast stroke

but i rather not due to those pesky kids

those pesky kids who swim too fast, showing off their ability to cross 50m of water over and over again at a speed only show-offs would do

i mean what are those kids doing anyway, swimming away their day instead of going home to do their homeworks?

i bet their parents are shoving them into the pool because they are not smart enough to excel in school and they so desperately need their kids to achieve in something, however trivial, in life. Hah! ( I, on the other hand, excelled in school)

 if you just know how fast and how long they stay in the pool you would think they are half-fish, half-man creatures (come to think of it, one of the kids looks like a hito, a sun burnt hito)

i bet these kids think they are much superior swimmers compared to me but then im sure im better in math. Hah!

and im sure in the great scheme of things, swimming would be way below mathematics in importance

after all, no swimmer has won the Nobel yet right?


Take that you swimming midgets!